by Jeff Yerger
Can we please talk about that Old Spice commercial? You know, the one with the singing moms that debuted yesterday during the Bengals/Chargers AFC Wild Card game? The one that was creepier than Andrew Luck’s facial hair? The one that made the Dos Equis guy marginally less interesting, if only for the time being? Oh, you DO know which commercial I’m referring to, but you choose to block from your memory? I understand. Do you need a hug?
Old Spice “smellcomes” you to manhood in the creepiest way possible. Good lord that commercial was fantastic! It’s not even Super Bowl Sunday, but I think it’s safe to say this commercial wins at commercials forever. I mean, that thing had everything didn’t it? There were weird body movements, sexual innuendos, moms who looked like Susan Boyle, a creepy-may-or-may-not-be-a-pedophile-janitor outfit, show tunes, and manly body spray! There was even a lady in a laundry basket holding on to a speeding car for dear life, which I’m sure could be used as a metaphor for Andy Dalton’s performance yesterday.
What did we do to deserve such a commercial? I wasn’t sure whether to replay it 50 times or kill my TV with fire. A commercial so oddly disturbing like this one should be cherished… or destroyed, I can’t decide. Old Spice gave us the commercial we didn’t want, but we definitely needed. Oh, and it also gave us this wonderful gif…
Have fun sleeping tonight!